Chocolate Box 2020

I wasn't going to put up a letter, but AO3 refused to contain my verbosity, so all OW prompts here.

DNW: piss, scat, vomit, extreme underage. For all / ships, please assume a dub/noncon DNW unless otherwise specified.

Badass Female Warlord/Her Gentle Male Consort & His Brother Forced To Marry Her Worst Enemy (OW)

I like to imagine that he volunteered to be her consort because everyone else was scared, but then the two of them fell madly in love. So of course rescuing his brother is what he wants, right? And hey, she's already attacking her enemy, so win-win!

Some wrenches to throw into the plan, any or all or none:
-she didn't tell him and it turns out he hates this brother
-he didn't know she was going to be rescuing his brother and he snuck into her army in order to rescue him
-they're forced to broker a peace because the consort's parents are going to be really, murderously upset if she fucks this up for them
-the enemy was also forced to marry and would totally 'lose' to lose the brother except they have no idea that the brother is important to her
-the brother is really happy to be rescued but turns out to be an awful houseguest


Beleaguered Playwright/Actress Cursed To Ruin Any Show She's In (Original Work)

The playwright can be any gender of your choosing. Either comical or semiserious- is the actress's curse actively malicious? Absurd? Things that happen onstage or off? Does the playwright get any satisfaction from the actress's excellent portrayal of their work or are they distracted by the play's inevitable bombing? Is there some romantic or smutty method of removing the curse?

Confused Uptight New Ruler/Previous Ruler's Harem Eager To Serve (original work)

I'm okay with dubcon for this ship. The ruler can be of any gender, but I would prefer the harem to be composed of multiple genders.
Pretty much any setting is fine with me- medieval, futuristic, modern day, etc. Some ideas:
-Princess Diaries style succession where the new ruler has only just learned that they're royalty, and the harem may or may not be a weeny bit incestuous. Comments on how they resemble their deceased parent is a plus (bonus points if the parent is of a different gender to the new ruler).
-freshly conquered new kingdom where the populace are willing to accept the new ruler *as long as they keep the harem*. And yes, the harem will make it known if they feel that the new ruler isn't being sufficiently desirous of their services.
-literally just choose a new ruler by ritual lottery and saddle them with the harem as part of their new job, and btw ritual sex is also part of the new job!

Female Punk Musician/Uncomfortably Enthusiastic Female Groupie

I'm okay with dub/noncon for this ship.
If you're writing the groupie as a long time fan, following the musician on tour is a good way to get things started. Maybe the others in the band or the roadies recognise her and joke about it to the musician. Maybe the groupie is very vocal in the audience. Maybe she has no underwear left from throwing them all onstage at every show. (Maybe she is *very upset* to learn that the musician didn't keep them.)
If as a new fan, it would be fantastic for the musician to see a punk newbie with barely any spikes, maybe a few pins, and decide, hey I'm gonna eat this kid up. The groupie may be new to punk, but she ain't new to hooking up. And maybe she's new to clit piercings, but she learns fast.

Female Suitor Sent As An Insult To Ruling Monarchs/Princess Uninterested In Male Suitors

I'm okay with dubcon for this ship.
This is so deliciously charming. A loophole! The suitor is probably not expecting to be chosen! Plans are all upset! Heck, the people who sent the suitor probably decided that they were going to really go for the gold in insulting their monarchs, so they picked a woman who isn't in any way courtly or proper and only skilled at things useless at court. The princess is having the time of her LIFE and also her new wife is very muscly and that's a big bonus.

Queen who is the Last of Her Line/Male Consorts Vying to Father Heir (Original Work)

This is going for so much in one ship lmao. Hella smut, hella creampies, much much sex. Rituals? General 'hey you have a dick come fuck me'? An organised schedule of who fucks her when? A contest for most worthy consort? Pregnant sex? All sorts of bizarre superstitions the consorts come up with to ensure that their ejaculation is the winner? Just smut it up in here.

Robot Squicked By Organics Being All Ickily Organic & Pregnant Person Who Loves To Overshare

Honestly this just makes me laugh. Poor robot! Is the robot assigned to take care of the pregnant person specifically? Are they just working together for some purpose? How did the robot gain this disgust for the squishy bits of biolife? Does the pregnant person have ultrasounds and lists of baby names plastered all around their environment? How close is too close before the robot feels they have to replace a limb?

Slutty Girl Who Owes the Mob Money/Shy Virgin Male Accountant Working for the Mob (OW)

I'm okay with dub/noncon for this ship.
The mobsters probably want to kill two birds with one stone. Maybe they propose this to the slutty girl because they want to help their buddy lose his virginity. Maybe they propose this to the accountant because they want him to toughen up. Go wild with your imagination. Play it funny, play it upsetting, play it romantic, play it distressing, I'd be happy with anything.


Victorian Young Lady Who Can Handle A Dagger/ Male Cat Burglar Who Climbed In Her Window (OW)

This could go so many ways, but mainly I'm hoping for a luckless cat burglar who discovers a talent for eating young ladies out, and a very unconventional young lady who discovers a fondness for knifeplay and making guys come untouched. And maybe he's 'dumb' enough to come back again? Look, those jewels are really tempting, and also dagger-handling is really hot, and wow she smells really good. So what if he almost got arrested that one time. She's gonna make him teach her how to climb houses and pick locks.

Yandere Serial Killer/Egocentric Would-Be Victim Who Feels Perfectly Entitled To All The Attention

I'm okay with dub/noncon for this ship, although to be frank this is so messed up from the get-go it probably doesn't matter. Any gender configuration is fine, but if hard noncon is included I'd prefer the woman be the aggressor for m/f.
For me, the crux of this ship is that the would-be victim is protected from actually being killed precisely because of their ego. However the serial killer focuses on them- stalking from afar, cyberstalking, opportunistic attempted murder that turns into something more, interaction where the victim doesn't know they're a serial killer (eg neighbor, acquaintance, coworker) - I'm very much open to all kinds of gore both sexual and non-sexual, psychological games on both ends, etc. Happy, ambiguous or unhappy endings are all acceptable.